Dr P. did warn me I was in for a 'difficult' few weeks. And oh boy was he right. This is my 7th week on continuous Sutent at the highest dose and the side effects have peaked, I simply cant imagine them getting any worse.
Im having to type very slowly, using my nails, because my fingers are all split and sore and infected. My feet, who have behaved themselves until now, have decided they want a piece of the action so now the balls of my feet are incredibly sore. I can walk, but not very far and only by waddling along putting most of the pressure on my heels. I look like a penguin !
I can eat, but just a small amount at a time. Any more and I feel sick and end up rushing to the loo very regularly. The one thing I seem to have conquered though is the dreadful indgestion I was getting. Whilst we were on the cruise Caroline told me to try decaff coffee and caffeine free coke. The improvement has been amazing, I hardly ever get any indigestion now I steer well clear of caffeine - its in chocolate too which is a bit of a bummer.
The exhaustion is still a major problem and thats now exacerbated by the fact Im having trouble sleeping at night. I often wake in the early hours in discomfort, I wouldnt really call it pain, and have trouble getting back to sleep again. So Im permanently tired and find myself nodding off at the most inconvinient moments.
Every single hair on my body is now platiunum blonde (ok - its white), my arms, legs eyebrows and eyelashes and all the fine hairs on my face. Im turning into a Yeti !
Reading the above paragraphs it sounds like Im ready to be shipped off to the knackers yard ! But for some reason my body is coping amazingly well, My blood results are almost normal and no cause for concern at all. Ive lost a little weight, but not much and I still look well.
The best news of all is that my tumours still appear to be stable, buying me more valuable time.
Ive made a start on the childrens memory boxes. Ive bought a lovely photo album and am sorting out all the old family pics from years ago. Pictures of my parents, grand parents, grand grand parents and I even have one of my great-great-great grand father. He looks like Captain Birdseye !
The letters Im going to write them will be the hardest part I think. I need time alone to do this, away from everyone. So next Tuesday Im going down to Brighton for a few days to see my brother Jon and make a start on the letters. With a bit of luck the weather will be nice and I can sit on the beach at the same time and top up my tan !
Thats as long as I dont fall asleep on the train on the way down and miss my stop ofcourse !