Thursday, 17 September 2009

Behind the painted smile....

Caroline and I clashing horribly at the launch of 'Jane's Journey' !!

Its been 4 weeks now since the launch of the film and kidney cancer awareness campaign - and a pretty amazing 4 weeks it has been. I'm almost getting used to seeing articles and pictures of myself in the press or even on the telly now - but it still comes as a shock when a total stranger comes up to me and says "I saw you on the telly/in the paper/read your blog/watched the film - how ARE you?"

This happens a lot now, especially when I'm out locally. Its nice. For one thing it shows just how effective the campaign has been so far, and continues to be. How many people it has reached. In fact it has been calculated that it reached 45 million people world wide !!!

45 MILLION !!!!

It seems such an incredible number but when you think about the film itself being on YouTube and linked to so many Internet sites - kidney cancer, cancer awareness, medical and health web sites, Facebook groups, blogs, news etc... all the radio interviews, national and local, rolling news on Sky and ERBU news, its not that surprising the message has reached so many people. And its an ongoing process - there are still a couple of major pieces to be published, one in a well known women's magazine.

But as I said, its locally I really notice it. If I'm out shopping or at the hospital or in the bank there always seems to be one or two people who come up and start chatting to me and of course they always ask how I am....and say how well I'm looking.

I am looking well, especially with a bit of blusher and lippy on. And generally I do feel well. But as I sit here in this no man's land of waiting for my radio therapy and Zometa infusions to start, and to find out if I have funding for Afinitor, there is a small bubble of panic rising up from below the surface. I'm in the last few days of my Sutent cycle and yet the tumour under my right breast has grown very noticeably in the past week or so. And is now once again very painful. So it looks as if Sutent has stopped working on this one at least and I have no idea whats happening inside me. Hence the panic. Dr P. has arranged for me to have some radio therapy on it as well which should help with the pain at least but its only a stop gap - I need a treatment to stop the bloody thing growing. Its almost as big as what's left of my right breast now !

All I can do right now is keep as well as I can, stay positive and have faith in Team Jane who are working so hard on my behalf. And thank everyone for all their good wishes, emails, messages of support and comments on here.

And yes, if you see me in the butchers please come up and say hello, right now especially it means an awful lot.


karen said...

I wear that painted smile myself so often. I'm sure most of us do. Stay strong Jane and try to focus on your blessings while you wait to start your treatment. So much easier said than done I know, but we all need a reminder now & then that we need to enjoy the 'now', regardless of our situation, and leave tomorrow's worries alone. hugs to you as always.
Karen, across the pond in Ottawa

Sybil said...

Hi Jane, well the wanderer is back and it certainly was not a thought that out of sight out of mind was the case with you. Mary and I thought of you each and every day we were away and prayed that you were still battling away. It does get a bit weary this battling thing on occasions but then we remember what we have and what we thought months ago we might have, it is sure to keep us battling on with that smile firmly fixed in it's place.
Many hugs come to you from us, Oh I do wish we could meet...even if it is in the butchers LOL
Much Love Sybil xxx

Anonymous said...

Jane you continue to stand tall and a beacon to so many ,You shouldnt have to wait to here about drug funding, it should be NOW, have faith in your team, they will get you thru this , blessings on you

Jackie said...

How you stay so upbeat is beyond me! You are so very brave to face this full on all the time. I know I have my moments but try to remember how stong you are and try my very best to follow suit. You don't realise how much support you give to people you've never met who are battling this same disease and how very much we all thank you!
I sincerely hope the radiotherapy kicks in soon and the pain disappears. Keep on doing whatever you're doing Jane it seems to be working!
Jackie xx

LYN said...



Alexei said...

dear Jane, thinking lots about you. What an incredible figure, 45 million. You have done so much good. Hang in there.

ADB said...

Well done, Jane, and that is an understatement. Raising awareness of diseases like kidney cancer is so important, and you've moved mountains in your campaign. Woohoo!

pam said...

Hey Jane. You both look fabulous. I never noticed the clashing until you pointed It out. I am so pleased to see the amount of people who are now aware and I know this will definately rise In numbers. Your bravery and strength, as ever are tangeable and I hold you so dear In my very soul. You are the true symbol of a courageous woman and If I was nearer to your butchers I'd be squeezing you! (don't panic, I'm In Scotland! lol)I am, as ever, so proud to call you my friend. I sincerely Hope that your pain eases. Keeping you very close to me. Love Pam.x

Andy said...

Thank you for your kind comments in my journal. I would certainly come and say hello in the butchers (or anywhere else for that matter) but as I am in darkest Kent saying it on here will have to suffice! I admire your courage and determination and I know from my own experiances just how draining cancer and its treatment can be.

AngelaBradley said...

that is wonderful that all the efforts are getting out there and that others come up and ask how your doing. Your in my thoughts

Shirley said...

I dont know you personally Jane, but you have been my on line friend now for nearly six years. I pray for you each day, and I am happy always to read your posts and chat with you.
Take Care and God Bless, You are a remarkable Lady.
Shirley xxx

Colin D said...

And told my wife not to getup and say hello to you yesterday at the QE. Should have read this earlier :-)

Nice to see you though.

Yasmin said...

WOW good for you jayne your such an inspriration which comes directly from the heart and all the work you have put in has paid off 45 million worldwide heady numbers but the message does need to be out there and in the UK too where thi postcode lottery is ridiculous.

Take care