It's ok to feel down sometimes.
It's ok to allow yourself to have a bad day - an off day.
I had one of those yesterday - today wasn't that great either !
I felt 'dopey' - in a kind of semi coma, drifting off to sleep all day. Not hungry at all. It was very strange and most probably down to a mix of being tired, still being constipated (everything is still very sluggish due to my lying in bed now for 18 days having no exercise whatsoever) all the drugs I'm now taking and generally getting more and more bored and fed up. I actually dream about getting up, walking and sitting on the loo !
Today was a bit better - but my appetite is still non existant and I still feel sleepy most of the time. And tomorrow I have been promised my sluggishness in the bowel department will be resolved, one way or another, finally. So I could be in for an interesting day!
I've also made the decision that tomorrow will be different. I will be positive and upbeat and awake ! Two days is long enough. Yes, being stuck in bed with a fractured leg, often in pain, can be depressing - boring - annoying even. But its only for another week - just one more week before I can get on my feet again.
I'm not quite sure how long the rehabilitation is after an operation like mine - I'm hoping most of it can be carried out at home though and I can have an 'early release'! I will have spent way too long in hospital as it is (almost a month!!) and I'm sure the community physio's will be able to deal with me. I know it will be a strange sensation being able to both sit up and walk again after so long.
I miss my home - and Martin - and the kids - and the cats - and the garden - badly. Ive never been away for so long. Its horrible. I try not to think about it too much or I get upset, and there is no point.
I'm trying to do something positive and productive every day to make the time count, but it's not easy when you're tied to a bed !